Not coming soon to a chocolatier near you. Hopefully.


Last night I discovered that there had been an unfortunate incident in my refrigerator involving my emergency stash of dark chocolate. What, you don’t have an emergency stash? Well, it wasn’t really that I planned it that way. I bought a big stash to give away, and then ate most of it over a period of many months. 2 bars remained, often forgotten. Last night, I remembered them. I eagerly pulled out the plastic bag that wrapped up the 2 bars, and was surprised to find the bag looking wet. I pulled out the chocolate, and the wrappers looked wet, too. Not a good sign. I realized that they were oily. I peered back into the dimly lit recesses of my refrigerator, a scary thing to do even on better days. It did not take long to discover a little tub of pesto, laying on its side, its lid clearly not tightly sealed. The smell confirmed it was the culprit. Ever the optimist, I carefully removed the foil-lined wrapper from the bar of orange-infused 70% cacao fair trade organic dark chocolate, dropping it into a clean container without letting the outside of the wrapper or my oily fingers touch the chocolate surface. I washed my hands, and took an optimistic nibble. A second less optimistic nibble confirmed: the chocolate had been pestoed. Fatally so.

Because you know what is not a winning flavor combination? Dark chocolate with orange, basil, garlic, parmesan, and olive oil. Just in case anyone out there was considering experimenting.

Also, it is very hard to wash the smell of pesto off one’s hands. I keep washing them, but it won’t go away. I’m like Lady MacBeth, but with pesto. (Yet who would have thought the little tub to have had so much oily pesto in it?)

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16 responses to “Not coming soon to a chocolatier near you. Hopefully.

  1. Contaminated chocolate! This sounds very disappointing indeed.

    As for the lingering pesto smell: try rubbing raw parsley on your hands. (Well, if you have any lurking in the crisper…) It helps neutralize garlic, for some reason.
    Out, out, damn pesto!
    Just doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it?

    • It was quite disappointing. I haven’t thrown away the chocolate though. I guess I still have some hope.

      I must confess that by the time I posted this, the pesto smell had gone away from my hands. I’d mostly written the post the night before, and then updated most of it to reflect the time shift. I missed that paragraph! I was probably feverish, though, since I seem to possibly have strep. (At least I’m being treated for it.) But I think that bit is funnier in the present tense. (About the hand washing, not the strep. Strep is never funny in the present tense.)

      Useful tip about the parsley! Except I can’t remember the last time I had fresh parsley. Maybe I’ll have to keep some on hand!

  2. Or rub your fingers with a slice of lime. Takes away any lingering garlic odour and you end up smelling like a margarita.

  3. boo!

  4. Hi Alejna —

    This post got me remembering your having written about having tried chocolate popcorn when in Hong Kong. A few months back, I accidentally got given that (instead of butter popcorn). Lemme say that, unlike you, I don’t think chocolate popcorn works!! ;(

    • Hi, YTSL–
      Ah, well. I can see how it wouldn’t be for everyone. Out of curiosity, do you like other kinds of sweet popcorn? I’m a big fan of caramel corn and such.

      • Hi again Alejna —

        I do like caramel corn. My favorite cinema treat: a mix of butter and caramel corn. (You can get that here in Hong Kong — just ask for the mix. ;b)

  5. I’m actually surprised what with the salt & pepper chocolates and chili chocolate etc already out there that pesto chocolate doesn’t exist. So I did a quick google and found a number of interesting things; my favorite thus far is a recipe for pesto-basil chocolate cake with parmesan sour-cream icing from a blog called “BS in the Kitchen” which I swear is not by me. (if it were, it would have one sole post involving a microwave and soup) http://bsinthekitchen.com/pesto-basil-chocolate-cake-with-a-parmesan-sour-cream-icing/

    • bittertwee–You should start that kitchen blog.

      As for the pesto-ish chocolate cake, I can’t help but notice that it doesn’t have garlic. Basil I can see…and maybe even parmesan. Well, not really parmesan. But, it’s amazing what one can find on the internet!

  6. I love dark chocolate with chilies. I may have even dipped Lindt chocolate in salsa at some point, but I cannot conceive of a chocolate/pesto mix. The mutant cake recipe above gives me the shivers.

    • V-Grrrl–I share your squeemishness about the pesto chocolate cake. But I supposed I’d still try it. (Well, I won’t try to make it. But if someone made me one, I’d try it.) (Not that I’m suggesting anyone should make me one. If someone is going to make me a chocolate cake, I’d prefer that it be parmesan-free.)

      I’ve tried chocolate with chilies, but wasn’t really that into it. I wonder if I’d like black pepper better?

  7. That is a tragedy!

  8. Sad when one’s secret store of chocolate is contaminated. And I cannot commend diluting chocolate with anything but peanut butter. Sometimes. Or dipping fresh strawberries into it. Pure!

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